Bodied

Happy couple with motorcycle in 1950

Hi, just wanted to say how much I loved Bodied. It was so great in so many ways. I LOVED IT!!!!!!!! SO MUCH!!!! Thank you for making me think and laugh and laugh and laugh. My whole body was on fire when I left the theatre. I felt like I could climb a mountain while fainting at the same time. WTF!?

Antique Clocks In Desert Sand

This weekend was the 5 year anniversary of the time you came to NYC to do the Sirius Town Hall to promote The Marshall Mathers 2 LP. Happy Anniversary! It’s so crazy that it’s been so long. So much has happened since then and so much hasn’t happened since then. Everything is crazy. This whole world is crazy. I am crazy. Crazy for you. Crazier than ever. You should not have made Bodied if you wanted me to stop obsessing over you because now I am freaking CRAZIER FOR YOU THAN EVER. OMG! LMFAO!!!!

Woman in victorian dress

Mr. Mathers, I should not feel so happy right now but you made me laugh so hard today and you made me think and feel so deeply today. This year I have lost so much but I am really fighting so hard, harder than I ever have, not to lose my hope. I am fighting so hard to hold on to what joy I can. I am trying to be good. I am trying to live for what matters. I am trying but some days it is so hard. Seeing your movie today made me so happy. It’s everything I love about your artistry. You always make me happy. Even when I am sad that I personally failed to connect with you I am so, so, so happy that you are alive and well. As long as you are out there somewhere, I can see you and hear you and see the things you are doing and building. As long as you are out there somewhere I have a reason to be happy, to try to create again. Thank you for the ways you have inspired me to fight back against heartache and to “Never Say Die”. Thank you for filling my heart with so much laughter, curiosity, desire and hope. Thank you for making me stretch and grow. Sorry that I grow so slow. I wish it wasn’t so.

Have a beautiful week. Keep celebrating all the magic you bring into the world. Enjoy all the much deserved love, laughter and gratitude that comes your way. You are the greatest. Shine on!

#MoriorInvictus #Bodied

Sunday Serenade

Hey Handsome,

Just playing with GarageBand and thinking of you. 🎶 Hope you had a nice, peaceful weekend. ✨

“…Dear Sir, love your solitude and try to sing out with the pain it causes you. For those who are near you are far away…

believe in a love that is being stored up for you like an inheritance, and have faith that in this love there is a strength and a blessing so large that you can travel as far as you wish without having to step outside it.” 
 Rainer Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

Happy Birthday Wishes To You!

Happy Birthday, Marshall Mathers,

Sorry I haven’t been writing. I’ve been a real sad sack lately. Feeling tired, insecure,  bitter, angry, sorry for myself and unworthy of happiness and all that nonsense. I needed to stay firmly in the monotony of reality, to remember what is real and what isn’t, so I can keep my brains together and keep my heart from breaking beyond repair. Today though I feel better, like I can afford to dream again for today because seeing you shine makes me feel stronger. I am happier now because you put me in a good mood, watching you on Jimmy Kimmel last night. It was like Christmas in October! It’s beautiful to see you in New York climbing all over my favorite building. Just knowing you were here recently makes me feel so much better. You are super fine as always, with your furry baby face. (How’s your chin doing under there?) How can your sexy handsome face be 46 years old? Impossible.

Speaking of sexy…

My friend sent me this soulful medley and I love it so much. I’ve listened to it at least 10 times in the last 2 days.  I hope you love it too. It’s jam packed with Motown Magic. And YOU are Motown Magic so it reminds me of you.

All this awesome music makes a person want to dance! Check it out, Birthday Boy, all these people wanna dance with you for your birthday:

Now, I am feeling selfish, what about ME? I wanna dance with you on your birthday! Don’t you care about me? Don’t you care about what I want for my birthday? Oh you do? Well, let me tell you what I want. For our birthday I am demanding a gift from you. I am demanding that you dance with me right now. OK? Are you ready? Can you handle this?

That was fun! And just so you know (because I think I should mention it.) I dance wayyyyyyy better in person. Trust me, I could be lying.

Are you tired of my silliness? Do you need a birthday nap? Is it time for a bedtime story? I know a good one, it’s my favorite Christmas story. It’s a love story about two people who would do anything for each other. Allow me to read it to you here:

Well, Marshall Mathers, it’s time for me to go now, back to life, back to reality. Thank you for the gift of you, for living in full color, for being a man that I can adore. You are my hero for refusing to give up on yourself, for knowing you deserve to be happy, for always finding the strength to create, for always being fearless enough to share your voice. Sometimes I lose faith in this world, I lose focus and I get so overwhelmed. Your determined spirit always manages to revive me, and inspire me to try again.

Have an incredible birthday. You deserve to celebrate your amazing life. My birthday wish for both of us is this: I wish for us, good friends, excellent health and endless inspiration. May all of our sweetest and dearest wishes come true.

Shine on, Shady!

xo, y

#HappyBirthday #SexyBeast

Smoke Signals

This appeared in my twitter timeline yesterday and was already gone today:

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Deleted. So fast. Was it you? Maybe. Maybe not. In any event don’t waste another minute thinking about it. Don’t waste your time hanging around here reading bullshit fairy tales written by a fucking loser like me.

Shine On!

Hey Sexy Beast,

Wanted to leave you a Pink Floyd kiss to get MY 😉 weekend off to a magical, mystical, start.

Hope you are feeling all the love there is in this world for you. Have a Saturday that is as sexy as you are, por favor!

Shine on you crazy diamond!

xo,

y

#mainsource #shiny

Revival Aftermath

Hi There!

How are you Handsome? I miss chasing you all over the internet. It was so fun following your tour online and seeing all the pictures and video clips as they came out. I was sleeping with my iPad and waking up all night long and checking Instagram for a new fix of you. You look like you were having a great time. I like all the tee shirts you wore. Especially the one you wore in New York because I saw it in the flesh!!!!! Your sexy nipples were under there in NYC with me standing only a few feet away from YOU, my MAIN SOURCE of inspiration.

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My head explodes when I think about it. You look so good, Mr. Mathers. So, so good. You have so much energy and I love it!!!! And I love your sexy dance moves too. I lived for your updates and left a trail of heart and flame emojis all over cyberspace. What the hell am I gonna do with my life now that your tour is over? You can only like pictures once on Instagram! And I feel like I “liked” every picture of you that exists so far.

Congratulations on going Platinum too. You deserve it. You made something so meaningful with Revival. I am still processing it… in a way I feel like it’s your “heaviest” album, if that makes sense. There is so much more I feel about that, but I’m uncomfortable putting it here. But I am so proud of you and your incredible creative and professional intuition. You are a truly gifted artist AND businessman and you have proven it once again.

It’s been hard for me to write all week. I realized it would really hurt me if you were reading this and laughing at me, but I know I would get over it eventually, because deep down inside I’ve very happily been a fool for you all these years! I think you are more than worth it.

Anyway, I bought this box for more private thoughts, also because I like the feeling of writing paper letters to you.

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There is only one sad boring letter in there now, but maybe it will get better as I really open up. You are my diary, Mr. Mathers. Writing to you while watching your growing joy is helping me remember important things about myself. You are helping me understand the map of my heart and helping me keep track of it and heal it. You singing and laughing and dancing and creating your magic across the planet is energizing me. Chasing your life force online is helping me find the beauty in the world, and reminding me that I need to live, and helping me heal the deep cracks in my hope. You are the greatest.

Thank you for rocking and rolling the way that you do.

I am in awe of you.

xo,

Y

#MainSource