Here’s To Another Decade of Awesomeness

Congratulations on your Ten Year Sober Anniversary!

It’s a very, very, very sexy occasion. And you look very sexy running around being all sexy on your very sexy tour.

Please allow me to play VJAY for you, to entertain you on this very special day.

First, I want to say thank you for being my religion all these years. You have helped me avoid the great tragedy of making a fool of myself for Jesus, like this guy:

Secondly, I would like to thank you for blowing my mind. No. Really. Thank you. I didn’t really need it, anyway. Minds are overrated. It’s hearts that really matter. That’s what hearts say anyway. Don’t ask a brain what matters more. A brain will lie. They are very clever.

Third: if you ever get bored, my God, and have nothing to do I’m having a never ending “pity” party at my place and it’s actually very fun. Bring the antidote. I feel like you do.

You look fantastically fit, BUT If you ever need fitness inspiration because you want someone sinewy, psychotic and cheerful to motivate you I am sending this:

Are you having a fun sober anniversary yet? I hope so. If this blog is making you feel stalked I do apologize. It’s because I walk the line.

I’m a space bound rocket ship and your heart’s the moon! AND I’M AIMING RIGHT AT YOU!

Here is another reason to be proud of your sobriety, these people drink:

Seriously, I don’t like what the video-poster said about this woman… it’s mean…  her video is so awesome, I love her realness. The video made me laugh until I cried because she’s me in 20 years and I am hilarious in the future! And I am determined! I am not giving up on love, even if love gives up on me.

Anyway, I have pestered you long enough. Right?

Fine! Push me away! There are other fish in the sea, dammit. I’m going fishing.

BTW Cheryl and I love your nipples in this picture:


Thank you for that.

Oh, who is Cheryl? She’s single and ready to mingle, too:

Sorry, I am so immature. Me and my inner child are BFFs from way back.

I hope you don’t mind

I hope you don’t mind

that I put down in words …


Congratulations on your sobriety! You have earned all of the comfort and joys that come with being resourceful, disciplined and focused! Keep shining and glowing and doing all of the incredible things that you do with your life force. This world needs you. I obviously need you in this world.

Stay happy, healthy and strong, always!

And please, live forever!

Thank you,




#Sexy #Sober #Celebration

#Happy #Healthy #Strong

#Revival #Gratitude